A Reckless Fear
by Epicocity
Summary: Oneshot. "Recklessness is the absence of fear. Courage is the triumph over it." Fear was a constant of life, yet Serena noticed that Ash had none. And the actions he took because of it filled her with her own fear, and she had to show him why...even if it meant conquering it. Amourshipping.
**Here we are again: Oneshot Tuesday! This time, however, it is** _ **not**_ **part of the AU that makes up "Love in the Time of Teamwork". Nope. This is a standalone, but it does have spoilers through XYZ 20. That said, I won't leave you hanging around for much longer. Please enjoy.**

 **Author: Epicocity**

 **Rating: K**

 **Pairings: Amourshipping, of course.**

 **DISCLAIMER: I, in no way, own Pokémon. Please stop making me put this here.**

* * *

 **A Reckless Fear**

An Amourshipping Oneshot

Fear was a constant of life.

Not that Serena liked it at all. In fact, she hated being afraid of anything, especially when she was around a certain someone that happened to show absolutely no fear with whatever he was facing. That was why she tended to bury her fear deep down inside (though even that tended to manifest itself by her blurting out the first thing on her brain). Yet, even as she did that to herself, Serena also recognized that she had never had a moment in her life where she _didn't_ fear something.

At the age of five, Serena feared being lost. Maybe it was because she was always around her mother, who kept her stuck to her side like glue. Even when she was off doing her Rhyhorn Races, Serena would be stuck to the side of her mother's manager, cheering like crazy. There was no chance of her getting lost, even at such a large a place as the race track. As a result, she was able to keep her fear under the surface. There was no reason the bring it out.

Then came that fateful Summer Camp.

It was the first time she got lost, and she wanted to cry her eyes out. For the first time in her life, a real fear had manifested itself inside of her.

First summer camp, first chance of being lost.

That was a moment where she decided that she hated both summer camp…and being lost, of course. Only, after the fear had entirely sunk in, set off by a Poliwag no less, it was suddenly banished. A simple hand reached out to her.

Serena was scared of that, too. After a moment of swallowing her fear of this stranger (and a boy, at that), Serena took the hand and the courage set in. She no longer feared getting lost, and it was all thanks to him.

At age seven, a new fear manifested in Serena: the fear of Rhyhorn. Normally, she had no problem with them…when they were at a distance. That all changed when her mom made her learn how to _ride_ them. It meant getting close to them. It also meant being tossed to the ground more times than a girl her age ever wanted to be.

First Rhyhorn ride, first major tumble to the ground.

She remembered crying then, too, only this time it was into her mother's chest rather than to the rustling woods outside of Pallet Town.

The next day, Serena was scared of Rhyhorn, but she choked back the scary feelings, mounted that Rhyhorn again and began to learn how to ride. Soon after, she was a Rhyhorn Racer. Well, not anywhere near her mother's level, but she was no longer scared of Rhyhorn, even if she hated the training.

Then the day came that she saw Ash Ketchum on television, and she was bursting with joy. That joy came intermingled with fear, though, as so many questions entered her head. Would he remember her? Was she ready for a journey? How would her first Pokémon be? What did she want to do with her life? Those fears diminished in the face of stepping forward into the great wide world. Although, Serena realized when she looked back, she was completely unprepared for what lay ahead and a very real fear, stemming back to childhood, came back with a vengeance: the fear of the woods.

The woods were a scary place, Serena noted when starting the journey with Fennekin. They were filled with Beedrill and Ursaring and Scolipede, and all she had was her brave but small Fennekin to keep her safe.

First journey, first moment of running for her life from a nest of ornery Beedrill.

She really hated the woods after that, and she knew from that moment that she didn't want to spend a night in the woods. Ever. So, naturally, when she had finally met up with Ash and went on the road with him, she was surprised when he said "Let's camp out," so nonchalantly.

It made no sense. Why stay in the woods? Why couldn't they find a shelter? And why…why in the entire world were Ash, Clemont and Bonnie acting like sleeping in the woods was _fun_? Weren't they scared of the nightly noises? Or the wild Pokémon? Or…or…Serena's fears were truly ready to consume her, until Bonnie had taken her hand that first night and said something with a giant grin.

"Let's play Pokémon impressions!"

"Impressions?"

"You know, where we pretend to be Pokémon to pass the time. Clemont used to play it with me all the time when I was a little kid to help me get to sleep. He could only do Heliolisk, though. It was cute!"

Serena didn't have it in her to remind Bonnie that she _was_ still a little girl. Still, Bonnie's suggestion helped her immeasurably. Playing Pokémon Impressions made the first part of the night pass by so easily, and hearing Bonnie's light snores as they drifted off to sleep comforted her. She wasn't alone in this. The next evening, when they had to stay in the woods, Serena decided that she wouldn't let them stop her from continuing to travel with Ash. Nope. Serena vs Woods. Winner: Serena.

The next time fear struck was when _she_ first entered their lives. _Miette_. Not that she minded the blue-haired patissier these days, but that first meeting hammered something into her head: she wasn't the only girl who was developing or could develop feelings for the oblivious black-haired trainer at her side.

First new girl, first time the potential of Ash walking off with some new floozy became a reality.

And Serena couldn't believe she was actually thinking things like that. This time, the fear came in a different form and in a different moment. Only after Miette had departed, did Serena fear that Ash would leave her.

How did she deal with it? That was a question she asked herself all the time, because she had yet to do anything with the feelings inside her chest. If she were lying to herself, she would have said she overcame that fear by asking Ash if they would always be together after Reflection Cave, and by sticking to his side this entire time. If she were lying.

None of that mattered when she decided on her dream, though, because it pushed aside one fear she had yet to get over and replaced it with another: the fear of failure. And failure hit her hard. Harder than it had hit Ash when he lost in Santalune. Harder than Team Rocket getting blasted off every other day in their quest for Pikachu. She failed so epically, that for a very brief moment, fear consumed her.

First Showcase, first failure.

Fear of failure morphed into so many other fears that she drowned in them on the docks. She feared she wasn't smart enough. She wasn't pretty enough. She wasn't strong enough. She wasn't talented enough. And she feared, above all, that she wasn't good enough to continue on. Had it not been for her Pokémon, she may have given up on herself. Until she remembered that euphoria of walking on the stage before the tumble, and those words, "Never give up until the end". That was when she decided that she couldn't fear failure. She was _going_ to fail. It was a part of life, and being scared of it was pointless. Knowing this, she cut her hair and resolved to never fear that again.

It became useful to her in every moment. Sure, there were the murmurings of fear every time she walked on the stage, but she reminded herself of that joy and it went away. Never did she think that road would end up leading to a new fear.

But the moment Palermo had offered her the invitation to train and become Kalos Queen, there was a definite fear. One she never thought she'd have to endure, because she always thought the opposite had the potential of happening. Now she feared _herself leaving Ash_.

First offer, first time she truly doubted that her dream was the best for her.

Even now, Serena wasn't sure if she had banished that fear from her mind, but she had certainly stood up with courage. No doubt Palermo had expected her to cave. After all, this was her dream. Anyone would have leapt up at the opportunity to train under a master. Yet Serena hadn't. Leaving Ash wasn't an option. Not yet. So she pushed down that fear, combined with her old fear of never being good enough, and told Palermo what was on her mind.

That probably impressed the older woman, judging from her reaction. And overcoming all of those fears had led her here, to this moment, where her greatest fear was coming into play in the worst way possible: the fear of _losing_ Ash.

"Give Pikachu back!" Ash was screaming, climbing up a tree to get some altitude. Serena, Clemont and Bonnie were running after the trainer. Up above, on the other side of a great ravine, was Team Rocket, having captured Pikachu in one of their electricity resistant machines.

"Keep complaining all you want, twerp. Pikachu's ours now," Jessie taunted him, a little foolishly, given Ash's current state of mind. Serena realized that, especially when he reached the top of the tree.

"Talonflame, I choose you! Go get Pikachu!"

"Flame!" The Scorching Pokémon sped out towards Team Rocket's balloon with impunity. James appeared to clutch Inkay, not even sending him to attack as he appeared to realize something which Meowth noted.

"Oy vey, he's got that look in his eyes, Jess."

"Who cares? Gourgeist-" Before she was able to issue the order, Talonflame came ripping through the balloon with a Flame Charge. As was expected, the balloon exploded, sending Team Rocket flying with their usual, "Looks like Team Rocket's blasting off again!"

Everything went to hell after that. Pikachu flew out from his orb-shaped prison, caught in the explosion that obscured him from view. Ash leapt down from the tree in an attempt to get to the other side of the ravine where Pikachu was. Serena's hand clenched as she ran for him, knowing that the tree was too far of a jumping point for Ash to reach the other side safely. She had to make a move that was closer…especially since Bonnie didn't have the jumping power, and Clemont was…well, Clemont. Ash was now flying over the ravine and one of his feet hit the other side, Pikachu bounding into his arms. His other foot was the issue.

"Pikapi!" Pikachu cried out as Ash's foot slipped on the wet rock, his trainer crying out in pain. Serena pumped her legs and then leapt forward, almost like a gymnast. She didn't have the same kind of jumping power as Ash, but it was her only option right now…and her option turned out to be bad. Really bad. She had crossed far less distance than Ash, making it relatively easy, and she had made a perfect landing. But she also grabbed onto Ash's arm, trying to pull him back up. That was a mistake, because the rock now broke away and both were sent tumbling down the slope into the ravine.

Serena held on tightly as she heard Bonnie screaming for them, but the young girl was incoherent over the sound of the three of them tumbling. Not until Serena had fallen on top of Ash at the bottom of the ravine did the ringing in her ears finally stop. Realizing the rather embarrassing position, Serena got off.

"Are you okay, Pikachu? Ash?" she asked instantly. Pikachu nodded a little, though he was stumbling back and forth, as if in a daze. Ash was slower to get up, and Serena noticed something was off with him. As he pushed himself up, he was wincing, like his hand hurt. When he got to his feet, he didn't even have the capability of walking. His foot gave in and his back slammed against the ravine wall. Even worse was that Serena realized he was stumbling on the foot that had landed on the rock, not the other one.

"Ash, Serena, are you guys okay?" Clemont called from overhead.

"Y-yeah, we're fine," Ash breathed out, but it didn't sound like it was easy for him to do so. Serena watched him for a moment and puffed her cheeks a little. He had done it again; pulled some reckless stunt that had gotten two parts of his body sprained instead of the usual one or none. Knowing this, she decided to let Clemont hear the truth.

"No, Ash is hurt. I think he sprained his ankle and his wrist. I don't think I could carry him out of this ravine on my own," Serena yelled up. Clemont looked concerned, though she couldn't distinguish all his facial features from where she was. Bonnie, thankfully, swooped in to the rescue.

"Big brother, there's a big bridge I can see all the way that way!"

"Dene!" Dedenne chirped out. Clemont turned in his sister's direction and nodded before kneeling before the ravine to shout down into it better.

"Serena, we'll hit up that bridge and try to find a safe way down. If we can't, we'll go and get Officer Jenny in the next town over. Sit tight with Ash," Clemont called down to the both of them. Ash was breathing too heavily to answer, though Serena did notice him try to start moving.

"Okay!" Clemont vanished from sight mere moments later. Serena turned around and put her hand on Ash's chest, pushing him back a little to prevent him from moving. Her face lit up like a Christmas tree as she did so.

"Pipika!" Pikachu cried out and Serena noticed him pointing to a large, flat rock that Ash could sit on. Serena nodded and quickly slipped underneath Ash's arm, having him hold onto her. It wasn't easy, and for a moment, Serena felt she would collapse under the weight, but she wouldn't let Ash keep standing like this. Mustering her strength, Serena moved a few feet forward, listening to Ash hiss in and out with his breaths until they were at the rock and she placed him down on it.

"Shoe off," Serena said sternly, a bit of venom finding its way into her tone. Ash seemed to flinch at the command, but he reached down with his good hand and slid the shoe off. Serena nearly retched at the sight of the purple-yellow bruising along the ankle, but she knew just looking at it wouldn't help Ash. Sighing to herself, she reached into her bag and took out a cloth. There was a river running near them, so Serena went to it and dipped the cloth in it, taking it back to Ash's foot and covering it. He hissed again, but it seemed more out of some relief. With that done, Serena wasn't sure what else to do except wait for help…alone…with Ash…(okay, Pikachu was there, too).

"That feels nice, Serena," Ash mumbled, his eyes closed a little. Serena looked down and realized that her hands were absentmindedly massaging Ash's foot. She blushed a little, but didn't stop.

"Ash, you're too reckless. You know that right?" she said quietly, almost a whisper because she was afraid of saying it. She didn't want to cause a fight between them. Unfortunately, Ash did hear her because he opened his eyes and looked down at her.

"I had to do it. They had Pikachu," Ash insisted. "Sometimes you have to take a chance, right? If it's for my best friend, I'll do anything."

"That's part of the problem…" Serena sighed out. Ash blinked at her, like he didn't understand what she was saying. "Ash, you leap from buildings or out of airships just to save Pikachu, and while it's admirable…you could get hurt…or even die."

"But I don't," Ash argued back to her, pointing out the obvious. At this, Serena stood. She didn't want to argue with Ash or scold him, but she was worried. No…she was fearful that Ash would seriously get himself killed, continuing on like this.

"But you could," she snapped. Ash flinched again and Serena couldn't help but let another sigh pass her lips. Pikachu was on the rock, looking between the two nervously, like he expected Serena to be a powder keg and explode on his trainer. Seeing that made her take a breath and rein herself in. "Ash, if Mega Blaziken or Goodra hadn't saved you…you wouldn't be standing here from those moments. And, the truth is…if you died because of your recklessness, you would hurt everyone around you. Not just Pikachu, but me and Clemont and Bonnie, not to mention your mother and Professor Sycamore."

"Serena, that's not recklessness," he corrected her, still wincing at the cloth on his foot. "It's determination to save my friends."

"So, you're not afraid when you jump out of planes or off buildings that you could die? You're not afraid that you'd hurt other people?" Serena asked. She was hardly containing the potential fury in her voice. Why did he have to be so stubborn? Why did he have to be so obstinate? And for the first time, Serena had to wonder, why did she have to fall in love with him? Didn't he get it at all?

"Well, everybody kind of is, but in those moments, I just act on instinct," Ash answered her, rubbing the bridge of his nose nervously, like he hoped to give the right answer. "I'm not afraid if I'm doing what's right, and that's not a bad thing. I see it as being courageous."

"That's not…" Serena was unsure about what she could say to him to make Ash understand. "That's not courage, Ash."

"What isn't?" he asked, like he genuinely didn't know to what Serena was referring. Serena bit her tongue a little, trying to find the words. They weren't coming to her quite then, so she did what she always did when she felt her courage failing her. She looked at Ash, his big, brown eyes looking at her in genuine interest with what she was saying. Serena knelt back down again, so that their eyes were level. This wouldn't be easy.

"Recklessness is the absence of fear, Ash. You don't fear things, and that's why you're reckless," Serena scolded him in an even voice. He nodded a little, almost like he was scared, but definitely like he was absorbing in all the information that he could. "But…courage is the triumph over it."

"I don't get it…" he said simply, his mouth forming into a thin frown. Serena's mouth had started working on chewing at her cheek. There had to be a simple and blunt way to make sure Ash understood why he needed to think before diving off a cliff. That he couldn't make Serena and the others fear losing him.

That was when it hit: Serena had her own fears. More than that, she felt she had overcome almost every single one of them except for one, which was the fear that Ash would leave her. More than that, it was the fear of outright confessing to him. Maybe that was what she had to do in order to show Ash what the difference was between courage and recklessness…

First confession…

"Ash," she began, sucking in a breath. He looked at her with those bright brown eyes, shining with curiosity behind him. Pikachu was looking at her, too, and she knew that she had to do this. "I like you."

"Really? I like you, too," Ash said with a grin, offset almost immediately by a grimace of pain. Serena would have fallen over at his utter obliviousness. Clearly just saying it wasn't getting her anywhere.

"Okay…I don't…" she huffed out, puffing her cheeks just a little. Serena then moved around Ash and sat down on the rock, his face turning to look at her. "Ash, I'm a very scared person."

"You mean, like, when we go to all those haunted houses?" Ash asked. Serena nodded.

"Yeah, but more than that…I was scared of a lot of stuff as a kid. Even on this journey, I've been scared of a lot of stuff, but…" Here she breathed deeply again, hoping to get to her point. "But, I've pushed through it. I knew I was scared, but I reminded myself that what I was shooting for was something greater. Like right now…I'm scared of losing you, Ash. I'm scared of you leaving me, because I like you so much that sometimes my heart hurts…So, I need to tell you how much I like you, because otherwise, I'm just letting fear get the better of me.

"But when you fall off a cliff, you don't have any fear. You don't think about how you could hurt others. That's why…I'm taking my courage to do this."

Then Serena leaned in and kissed him on the cheek. It wasn't quite the verbal confession that she wanted to get out, but she certainly knew that it was more than she had ever thought of doing before now. His cheek was warm, but a pleasant kind of warm, and for a moment, Serena's mind wandered to thinking about what it would feel like to touch her lips to his. But that was also the moment she decided that this was enough courage for now. She had pushed away her fear of being rejected, and now she was drawing back.

Ash looked dazed. Somehow, this made Serena smile.

First _pseudo_ -confession, first starry-eyed look on Ash's face.

He reached up and touched his cheek, like he didn't know exactly what it all meant. His face was tinged pink and he was starting to blink rapidly, like his mind was attempting to catch up. That was good enough for Serena. Finally, after a moment, he nodded.

"Okay," he said quietly. Pikachu leapt into his lap, his head swiveling rapidly back and forth between the two trainers before he curled up with a content smile on his face. "I understand."

"Do you?" Serena asked, almost teasingly. Ash smiled and nodded again.

"I don't want you to be sad, Serena…and I sorta get that jumping off cliffs would make you sad," he answered. Serena smiled softly. She wasn't sure how he had arrived at this conclusion, but she was happy that he seemed to now know that jumping off cliffs or towers without a second thought was a _bad_ idea.

"Heeeeey! We brought Officer Jenny!" cried Bonnie's voice. Serena looked ahead of them and saw the Lumiose siblings approaching on the bottom path they were on, riding in what looked like a big truck.

"Come on, Ash," Serena said, holding her hand out to help him up. He smiled and hooked his arm around her shoulder. She continued to blush a little, with his face so close to hers, as the trio continued to rapidly approach. Pikachu leapt on top of them.

"By the way, Serena…there _are_ things I'm scared of," he said. It was quiet, too, almost like a whisper. Serena turned her head back to him.

"Like what?"

"I'm scared of you being upset with me…I don't like it when you look sad because of me," he confessed. Serena smiled at that.

It wasn't a confession. But, for now, it was good enough.

 _Fín_

* * *

 **Author's Note: So, this is the end of this one. Yes, I know, I didn't get Ash and Serena together at the end. Why? Would have felt too forced, but it was enough for Serena to overcome some of her fear about confessing in this story. In fact, that's the whole point and reason that this story was written: "Recklessness is the absence of fear. Courage is the triumph over it." I hope I portrayed that well. I wanted to start by showing Serena's fears at all the first things in her life and how she came to overcome almost every one of them, compared to Ash, who really isn't scared of anything…even if it's a bio-genetically created Pokémon bent on proving his superiority over everything…Hell, he's not even scared of dying, and I wanted Serena to hammer into his head why that's not a good thing to be. That said, I'm wondering what you all thought!**

 **I have to thank everyone who read and reviewed the last oneshot (and the one before that, as well). There is one more oneshot, which should come next week. After that…yep, I have a sequel to "Love in the Time of Teamwork" in the works. It's still in the planning stage, and I'm sort of waiting for the setup of the Flare arc, and possibly the conclusion of it to write the story, so you may not see it until August-ish…depending. However, don't think I won't come up with other oneshot ideas in the meantime. With the Winding Woods coming up, I'll probably get some great material for the AU I've established for some more oneshots. Well, all that said, please do Review and, as always…**

 **Dare to Be Silly,**

 **Epicocity**


End file.
